Tomorrow will make 3 weeks. 3 weeks of itching...3 weeks of scratching...3 weeks of oozing and bleeding...3 weeks of hearing "oh my god that looks disgusting"....3 weeks of pain...3 weeks of poison ivy.

It started at our company picnic where in I managed to walk through what everyone, after I had been in it, immediately identified as poison ivy. The first week wasn't bad, a little itching and redness. Of course, since it wasn't too bad yet, I first wasn't even sure I had poison ivy and certainly wasn't aware that I was periodically spreading it to every corner of my body.

The first weekend was when it started getting bad. We were in Fort Dodge for our friends' wedding, which I was officiating. It was a great time and I think I did an alright job not ruining their wedding. I had one unfortunately loud POP at the beginning when I asked People to "Please rise" and the Puff of air Profusely Pounded the mic Past its Positive Pressure Point. After this, however, I actually remembered to tell everyone to be seated...a minor detail I forgot at my last wedding. The only tough part, other than trying not to squirm and itch my leg, was when the unity candle ceremony began. The way it was set up had me holding the candle while it was lit - which sounded like a good idea until I saw those drops of hot wax beginning to fall. I managed to brace myself and not even react as the droplets landed and solidified across my fingers.

After this weekend, it all got worse. It spread and deepened...and got infected. I don't know where the infection came from, but I'm tempted to blame the America's Best Value Inn in Fort Dodge (which is a "best value" for a reason) - but that's just because I'm prejudiced about exterminators and pest controllers roaming the halls of my hotel looking for entry points. Not that our house couldn't use an exterminator also.

I wound up having to make two separate trips to the doctor - luckily only the second was bad enough to involve two shots, one in each "hip." So two shots, steroids, steroid cream, three different antibiotics, and endless gauze wraps - if that doesn't do the trick, I don't know what will.

The hideous boils and rashes have led to a few interesting experiences however....people keep their distance, for one. This weekend when I was home visiting, Aaron was worried what swimming might do to my leg....while my dad was worried what my leg might do to his pool. I've never seen him actively suggest someone not go swimming. Also bad, was when I wore shorts through the airport the other day, but kept my leg bandaged with gauze. However, one bandage kept coming un-taped and falling down. I've never seen such looks of horror on people faces as when they saw my exposed sore...the dressing dragging across the ground. I'm sure I would have been nervous too. However, the one person who didn't see it...or didn't care...was the woman sitting next to me on my flight to Florida. She asked for several drinks before the flight, but couldn't get them until we were airborne. Instead of being calmed by her vodka/orange juice, she was calmed by repeatedly grabbing my shoulder...asking what that noise was...and begging me to tell her everything was okay. I tried to do this, telling her the noise was just us leveling off and making up a bit about altitude and flight trajectories when she was worried we leveled off too soon - unfortunately, she was a lawyer and immediately saw through it and called me out accusing me of making it all up and "pulling it out of my ass." I considered just putting on my headphones and letting her panic at that point, but decided to talk her through it. She made it through the flight, and was appreciative...and in a strange coincidence, I actually ran into her and her son at a Jacksonville Baskin Robbins the next night. (I hear Oreo shakes were good for soothing poison ivy...is that not true?)

While this whole poison ivy thing still sucks, I think it is actually starting to get better the last two days - it hurts less, but there is still an awful lot of itching....and....wait... what are those red dots on my chest?

Float Fun for No One!

I am back in sixth grade. I am at the skating ring and the super popular girls ask me to skate with them. I agree,...and they proceed to give me a wedgie and skate off. This memory came to mind as I sat in a meeting room at my current place of business (I am not allowed to discuss where I work. lame) with a handful of grown woman arguing over float ideas. None of these woman with their place-of-business-badges glistening under the lamp lights ever paid me any mind. Every idea I gave went unnoticed. You could almost hear their ridiculous silent judging ("she wants to what with what??"). I had to keep reminding myself that this float committee--which I was nominated to be on while I was out sick from work one day--was not a sixth grade party at a skating rink. And these woman, who took this float committee thing way too seriously, were not the tween bullies from my past.

The theme of this year's contest is 'Small town, big heart'. My group decided on using Parkersburg as the prime example of this. I was gone during this discussion, so when I came back and was told that we'd be recreating the tornado ravaged town, I was...ambivalent, but I had a lot of ideas.

All of my ideas during these meetings (I've had three of them so far) have been ignored and frowned upon. Seriously,...it's a freakin' chair float contest and the winning department gets a pizza party. You'd think this contest was for a shot at eternal life or a large cash prize. Nope. Casey's pizza.

The thing that gets me the most is that some of my ideas that have been shot down out of thin air during the meetings have been created. And someone else has taken the credit! I used to read stories about office behavior like that in my Cosmo magazines, but thought I'd never experience that...at least while being a part of a committee that cuts out construction paper people and pop bottle tornadoes.

Float judging is this Friday. Just to be a good sport, I've still volunteered my time to make our team's float something worth looking at (the rubber band roads actually look cute. Too bad the cardboard people are all white teenagers. Not much diversity--a crucial rule of float building)

As long as no one gets wedgies by the end of this committee experience, it won't be too bad. Right?

Putting the "WHY?!?!" in Wyoming

So...our vacation is over and we're back in West Des Moines. After a week of camping, hiking, deserts and forests, what did we learn? One thing....do not ever end your vacation, when you just want to get home, with a drive through the never ending abyss that is Wyoming. Before we get to the joy of the trip, let's begin with the end. We left Yellowstone at 5:00 in the late afternoon yesterday knowing we had, according to Google Maps, a 15 hour drive ahead of us. As we set off, the signs said 100 miles to Cody, Wyoming followed by 90 miles to Sheridan (after which time we figured we'd be free and clear of Wyoming, on the Interstate, and maybe grab a hotel for the night). To make a long story short: 6 hours, 1 1/2 tanks of gas, 15 miles of unpaved mountain roads, 9 deer and 1 moose crossing later....we were still 30 miles shy of getting out of Wyoming. I still don't know how you can have to drive down out of a mountain 5 different times...without ever driving back up one - but that's the mystery of Wyoming. In the end, with all of that lost time, we had to just power through, drive the night, and get back home at 1:00 this afternoon...weak!

However, overall this was a great trip. Building on the last blog, here are some more highlights:

Food: We tried a lot of different foods on the grill. The ribs were great...the grilled onion, pineapple and cantaloupe were wonderful...the bacon and pancakes worked - except for the day we had no syrup...and the best may have been Noah's hand made snickers stuffed bananas. What didn't work was a little recipe I found on-line for cinnamon rolls. Take an orange, cut it in half, dig out the orange, put in the cinnamon roll dough, put the orange back together and cook in the coals. What the recipe didn't say was - wait 30 minutes, remove from the coals, and pour out the melted raw cinnamon dough. I don't like oranges or salmonella enough for this recipe.

Heidi's near death experiences: Roughing it in the wilderness leaves you open to the elements and it is best to be cautious. Heidi lived by this mantra and narrowly diverted disaster several times. We went lounging in the boiling river, where hot springs poor into the Gardiner river. This was beautiful and relaxing...until the moment Heidi, blind without her glasses, started drifting away, caught in the current, nearly swept away eventually to the pacific ocean.

Heidi managed to avoid most of the other dangers by refusing to get out of the car. While I ran with my camera along with dozens of other spectators to get pictures of bears, elk and big horned sheep...Heidi quickly locked the door to avoid the chipmunks. To be fair - she did eventually come out to see a young Grizzly and held control of the car when a moose darted out within 10 yards of her.

Noah and Desi: Unfortunately, we only got to spend one day with them, but they came along at just the right time when our supplies had run out. Without them we wouldn't have had forks, plates, pillows, bug spray, or bear spray (which both relieved and terrified Heidi). It was so much fun to get to know Desi more and we had a great time with them both.

Great Salt Lake: For our outdoor, camping and hiking adventure, we decided to spend Wednesday at one of America's great features - watching Harry Potter at an air conditioned theatre with a pizza hut inside it. Afterwards, however, we went to the Great Salt Lake. It has several rivers running into it and then bakes in the Utah sun with no natural outlet and leading to an incredibly high salt content. All of this results in two things - a beautiful natural scene and a god awful putrid smell. We drove out, holding our breath, and then hiked out to swim in the lake. The island we were on was called Antelope Island and so we were excited to see what we assumed would be herds of hundreds of antelope...instead, we saw thousands and thousands........of spiders. I don't know where the antelope were, but I can tell you were the spiders were. Their webs covered every bush and rock and they glistened in the sun as if from the most horrifying nightmare ever.

Arches National Park: It appears that we are not quite conditioned enough for hiking in the 100 degree desert sun. When we saw children and the elderly walking back from Delicate Arch we figured we'd give it a go. We scaled the hill - about 250 feet - and then, after catching our breath, dripping with sweat, having finished all of our water we looked out for the arch. All we saw, however, was a mountain, which apparently had to be scaled in order to get to the arch. We decided to power through and started off toward the mountain....for about 30 seconds....then we looked back....looked down at our empty water bottles....looked up at the scorching sun....and turned around. After all, there's a perfectly good look out spot a mile drive away - there's air conditioning there.

All in all...this was a wonderful trip. We got to go explore the West, like adventures of old, and after 60 hours in the car driving and being together 24-7 all week in a tent...we ....uh...we.....still.......stop it.... don't tell me what to type.....why don't you take a shower already......go sit on the other couch....I'm out of here....finish this yourself................love each other.

Don't forget to check out dylandbaker.shutterfly.com to see a selection of photos from the trip (tomorrow - we're going to bed now).

Well, it's the beginning of day 4 of our 2009 Summer Road Trip Extravaganza and we're finally able to write a blog. We were hoping to write one sooner, but it turns out none of our National or State Parks are set up with wireless access yet - of course, there has been wireless at each of the six Starbucks we've stopped at....but we always have to keep moving...we've got a lot of miles to cover. Anyway, here are some highlights of the last few days:

Heidi: I want to take you on a brief "Tour of Restrooms" from our great nation.

Small town, Nebraska - this gas station restroom is not for the faint-of-heart. In this facility, you'll find old food on the sinks, stalls with damaged doors that you have to keep shut with one foot, and possibly two to three cockroaches (one of which may still be alive and moving around just below your feet).

Rifle Falls, CO- imagine you're in the woods and you have to chose between going to the bathroom behind a bush or using a random portapotty. which do you choose? If you chose the port-a-potty, you'd be mistaken. In this bathroom, you'll smell a thick and stale aroma that reminds you of very old leftovers. There will be flies doing their thing around the very top of the toilet. And don't expect to wash your hands after you're done. No sinks in this bano. Next time, go with peeing behind the bushes.

Rifle Gap State Park, CO- if you have a sense of adventure, check out this outdoor restroom. Many campers frequent this facility just for the fun of what lies behind the doors. While you're doing your thing, you'll be wanting to have a nice, secure place to do it in. Not going to happen here. The door has a mind of its own and will not, under any circumstance, shut. not. going. to. happen. You'll never know who or what will try to sneak in while you're going to the bathroom. See? Outdoor living can be fun!

Dylan: The one thing we've done a lot of on this trip is drive. I don't mind driving, and I still don't after we've covered about 1200 miles (and are only half done). However, driving this new stretch of road has led to a few tense moments. First, there was the stretch in Nebraska where our rental car started making a strange whining noise and smelling of burnt rubber. At first I contributed this to the semi next to us, but once we passed it and the smell and sound remained, I began to get concerned. We took the next exit and checked things over...no flat tire, no fluids leaking, not dragging part of a deer carcass, nothing....so we pulled back on the interstate and tried to remain calm over the damage we may be causing to our rental car when we saw a sign - "This mile of highway made with 47,000 recycled tires".... now everything was clear. I'm all for conservation, but.......

Heidi was kind enough to help drive some of this trip. She took on quite a bit of Nebraska - where every mile feels like an eternity - even when listening to the amazing playlist I compiled for the drive. However, when it comes to mountain driving...that's another story all together. I knew I would drive most of this, but I didn't know Heidi would hyperventilate just riding along in the passenger's seat. I don't know if it was the shear drop offs with no guard rail, ramps specifically designed for runaway semi trucks, warnings of falling rocks, or signs telling what to do if your brakes fail, but it was all a little too much for her. I also learned a lesson about turning over the wheel too soon. We were through the mountains and back onto flat ground when Heidi offered to drive. I agreed, thinking I could use some rest. I was just drifting off to sleep when I was awoken by the sound of a loud and pressured "Dylan!" I woke up expecting to see us careening off a cliff or swerving to miss falling boulders, but instead the problem was that there was a mountain, off in the distance, that we might...at some point...be driving in to.

Well, there's a lot more to say, and we'll be sure to write more (especially since we have a hotel for another night). So for now we're going to go lay down on our individual plush pillow top mattresses (they were out of King rooms, and while neither one of us wanted to admit it, after two nights in a tent - after we forgot to bring pillows - having to have a room with two queen beds, one for each of us, actually sounded pretty good).

Have a great day...we will!

It's in the Bag

I haven't been camping in close to 17 years. The last time I went camping, I woke up my dad in the middle of the night thinking I saw an alien in the sky. Things are foggy after that...(and no Dad, the alien did not abduct me and erase my memory). Well, hold on to your seats folks because Dylan and I are getting ready to set out for a week-long adventure filled with CAMPING!

**I promise to write a longer blog about it later, but until then...enjoy the pictures of my favorite part of camping:

Dylan and I just got our new sleeping bag in the mail! I love it soooo much, that I am going to post another picture of me in it. Lucky you!

Yeah for new queen sized extra warm, super cool, amazingly awesome...SLEEPING BAGS!

Mary Kay (Dylan and I are seriously trying to think of a witty title)

Question. What would you do if you were invited to have lunch with a coworker (who just happens to be your Mary Kay rep)? And what would you do if said coworker tells you that she wants to grab some food and talk about the benefits of becoming a Mary Kay rep? If you answered "run like hell", good for you. I should have done just that.

I was excited to have lunch today with an actual human being. I usually spend my lunches eating alone, looking out the window at birds or overly ambitious coworkers jogging during their lunch break. Here's what I had envisioned for lunch today: me. coworker. talk of Mary Kay (very minimal), a fresh salad and key lime pie. Sadly, none of that really happened. Not even the food part. I met my coworker downstairs at the place I work (I'm not authorized to blog about my place of business...neat). She seemed a little preoccupied by something, so I said, "what's going on?" Her reply? "I'm waiting for my district manager to come down and talk to you about being a Mary Kay representative. She should be here any minute."

WHAAAAAAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! I had not planned on talking to some stranger about starting my own business. I had planned on eating a glorious piece of key lime pie. But, being the person I am I said "Oh, okay. Ummm...just so you know, I don't have time to sell Mary Kay." "No problem, it's no pressure...no obligation. She's pretty nice."

Well, "she" walked in the doors wearing head-to-toe pink and carrying a hot pink Mary Kay bag full of products. The three of us walked silently to the backest back, farthest far table in the dining hall. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary with that, right? Either way, "she" (I'll call her Pinks) started asking about me, Dylan and what products I currently use. "I can tell by looking at your eyelashes that you've been using our Miracle line of mascara!" said Pinks. I just nodded. I wasn't going to tell her that I use regular stuff...I'm just lucky to have freakishly long eyelashes.

Ten minutes quickly passed with her saying things like, "Holly, you'll fit right in with our family." and "Nowadays, women can do anything they want...they just need some encouragement" and "Don't you want to make other women feel good about themselves?" Just when I thought I'd answer with a sarcastic ''no'', my coworker,...the one who arranged this whole sit-and-chat...had to leave. I was left alone with Pinks.

With no food in my belly and my lunch break waaay over with, I finally told Pinks that I had to go. She gave me a personality test and invited me to an Eye Cream seminar that was to be held tonight (I thought writing a blog sounded more fun!). "I'll call you tomorrow to hear the good news!" said Pinks. I even told her that I might be moving to Germany in a few months. "We sell Mary Kay there too!"

Tomorrow I will not answer my cell phone if I see Pinks is calling. I love Mary Kay too much to never buy any again...but now I must find a new sales rep...and piece of key lime pie!

In Honor of Allison

Today's my birthday.  Even though I've celebrated six birthdays without my twin sister, Allison, I still catch myself feeling a little uncomfortable when I say that phrase.  My birthday.  It used to be our birthday.  Our birthday cake.  Our day.  So as I sit at the computer with my eyes welling up a little bit, I want to dedicate this blog to one of the nicest people who ever lived...my beautiful twin, Allison.  Happy Birthday, Big Al.

Some of you reading this never got the chance to meet her.  I can tell you this much...she was a lot nicer than I am.  (I tell Dylan that and I think he finds it hard to believe sometimes).  When I was flat broke, I used to come to the Whistle Stop Cafe in Boone, where she worked part time as a waitress on Saturdays, and order the cheapest thing on the menu--a single pancake.  I think it only cost 89 cents.  I'd show up early with my two bucks (one dollar for my pancake, the other for a tip), find a moderately cleaned table, and wait.  Allison always made sure to wait on me.  She'd say, "what do you want", to which I'd respond, "you know.  My usual."  She'd roll her eyes and bring me a big glass of Dr. Slice and then a pancake.  But that was just for starters.  She'd use her own tip money to buy me a regular meal:  two eggs, bacon, and hash browns.  Then, she'd plop down next to me and eat.  And she never took a dime from me.  Ever.  But that was just her being her.  When she passed away, ALL of her customers from the Whistle Stop showed up to her funeral to pay their respects.  They loved her.  And I know that those of you who never met her would have loved her too.

And she loved being a twin.  She used to get upset if I rejected her idea of dressing up alike.  "C'mon, that's what twins do!" she'd say.  Yeah.  But we were in high school.  And there was no way I was about to change from wearing hot orange pants and Hawaiian shirts to khakis and 3/4 sleeved shirts.  Nope.  Allison used to get angry when people would say "You guys sure don't act like twins."  Like literally.  She'd cry and get so upset!  "What do they know?"  We used to test our 'twin powers' just to prove people wrong.  She used to say "Heidi, what part of my face am I touching?"  I'd concentrate very hard and make a guess.  "Your...nose?  I mean, Your nose!"  Nine times out of 10 I was wrong.  But we liked to test out our twin-ness once in awhile.  

I could go on and on about how wonderful Allison was.  She was taken away too soon, but I am truly fortunate to have known her for 22 years.  Happy birthday, Big Al!  

Opinion Section

Point/Counterpoint

Oh my god!  I actually went to a cat circus! 

 vs. 

Oh.  My.  God.  I actually went to a cat circus.

Oh my god!  I actually went to a cat circus! by Heidi 

Felines riding on skateboards.  A chicken ringing a bell.  The acrocats.  A woman wearing a cat leotard and proudly sporting cat ears.  Those were just a few of the wonderfully magical items I saw when I went to a cat circus.  A crowd of about 100 people gathered into a medium-sized room in the Des Moines Social Club.  Drinks were offered, cat conversations were created, and eyes grew bright with wonderment.  I never thought I'd see the day when three cats literally played instruments in a band called "The Rock Cats".  Izzy was my favorite cat.  He (or she?) was all white and was alright!  She/he leaped on shoulders.  She/he played the drums.  I fell in love a second time (after Dylan) when I saw her/him eat tuna from the stage floor.  I was only slightly annoyed that we had third row seats.  What?  Is it really necessary to let small children and people in wheelchairs have the front row?  C'mon!  The cats rocked my world.  The chicken and groundhog tried to steal the show...(rude much?)...but Izzy and Custard and Isis and the rest of the cat clan held their own and shined like little diamonds on cheap cat collars.  I just wish it would have lasted a little longer and I would have made the MC get rid of the awkward pauses in her stories.  overall, the cat circus was purrrrrfect.  It was the cat's meow!  I was feline good after the show.    

Oh.  My.  God.  I actually went to a cat circus.  by Dylan

So...when I saw there was a  cat circus coming to town I figured, "what nicer thing to do for Heidi than get her tickets."  While I had no doubt that it wouldn't be my cup of tea, I had no idea the hour of sheer horror I was locking myself into by buying these tickets.  To begin, there were grown women in cat t-shirts and cat sweatshirts, grown women wearing fake cat ears, grown women lecturing Heidi and I on only having one cat, and, of course, little children... many of whom looked just as embarrassed to be there as me.  Over the loud speaker came the music...to get you in the mood, I imagine... Cat Scratch Fever, Stray Cat Strut, and something that sounded not to different from the Meow Mix commercial.  The show opened with a warm up from other animals doing amazing tricks, such as  rats walking around, ferrets walking around, and a groundhog placed on a small car and then pushed back and forth across the stage....Amazing!!!  Then came the host, or ringleader if you prefer, in the traditional full body black leotard with purple rhinestone accents....Just like PT Barnum used to wear.  The circus (and that is absolutely an appropriate title for it) that followed was basically an hour of the equivalent of watching you neighbor try to show you the "great new trick we taught the cat.   Come on Felix....push the bell...come on....push it...do it for mama....I swear he was doing it before....come on now....you have to see it, it's the cutest thing....come on...ring the bell.  Wait, maybe if I put a treat on the bell.  now get it...come on....who wants a treat...push it.  Here, Felix, let me help you.  give me your paw....now lets put it on the bell.... 'RING'....yeah!!!!  Good job Felix.  Wasn't that great?"   Well, let me spare you all the suspense...No, no it wasn't great.  However, we did get to watch the ringleader briefly make out with the ferret - though I'm not sure that was supposed to be the memorable part.

La, la, la....

I'll be honest...this blog really doesn't have a point.  It's just a hodgepodge of ideas...a stream of thought...a filter less rant of recent events.  

1.  Right now, Dylan is in the living room watching The Masters.  I quickly learned that's it's not the best idea to ask questions on subjects that I:  A) have no desire to know the answer of, and B) know will require Dylan to make visual aids and diagrams to help me figure things out.  With that being said, I won't bug Dylan and his golf watchin'.  

2.  I attempted to change the background of our blog.  Because I love bird watching so darn much, I figured I'd go with a bird theme.  I did drag Dylan in here a bit ago to have him look at it.  His reaction?  ''Oh, God".  I think that means he likes it!!!!!  

3.  Speaking of birds, Dylan and I did a bunch of yard work today.  Even though I've been a little under the weather, I thought it would do me some good to dig around in the dirt and set out some bird food.  Dylan mowed the lawn (And yes, we did find a dead snake...in the neighbor's yard!).  We then found an old can of re fried beans with a "surprise" inside.  A video was taken of the aforementioned event, and I am trying HARD to have Dylan put it on our blog.  It's not quite ''Cat in the can" level, but it is a good film with drama, screams, and some laughter.  

4  If I don't hear back from my doctor on Monday, a scarier version of myself may make an appearance.  For every one's sake, please cross your fingers that the doc will call!

5.  I secretly want a squirrel for a pet.  I just think they're soooo cute and crazy!  Dylan, if you're reading this...I either want a squirrel or tickets to the Cat Circus for our one-year anniversary.  :)  Just kidding...

6.  Next time I write a blog, there will be a definite point to it.  

Four.   It's a number.  It's my lucky number (as much as I believe in luck).  It's the month and day of my birth.  It's what I always bet on in roulette and power ball.  It's, in a way, what I yell after one of my horrendous slices in golf.  It's the number of horsemen of the apocalypse, a homynym for the word "death" in some languages of Asia, the number of chambers in the heart, the number of dimensions of space time, the number of letters in most swear words, and the number of blocks on each shape in Tetris.  It can be "Fab" in the case of the Beatles or "Fantastic" in comics and, in case you haven't figured it out yet, even has its own Wikipedia page.  However, as of this week, three weeks before my 30th birthday, it has a new significance...it is the number of gray hairs I can clearly and plainly see on my head.  

I don't mind getting a few gray hairs...at least I always told myself I wouldn't mind.  I also told myself I wouldn't mind turning 30.  However, I did find myself gettting awfully nostalgic while I stood there, looking in the mirror, combing through my hair with my fingers (examining each one), as I serached feverishly through my mind for memories of my youth....almost as frantically as I searched for the tweezers.  

This sudden onset of sophistication (that's what I've decided to call it) led to a weekend of reflection and an insightful examination of my youth....by this, of course, I mean that I watched a Back to the Future marathon along with Kindergarten Cop, Tremors, and Star Wars (Episode IV).  Back to the Future was, as always, amazing.  I know some people don't care for Part III...and others even have the gall to say that Part II is the best...but I know the truth.  Part I is the best, a classic, never to be rivaled.  Part III is next...a wonderful enabler of my fantasy of being a cowboy living in the Old West.  Part II...well...Part II I'll allow...especially since it gave us the Hover Board.   

When it came time to watch Star Wars, however, the joy did not last long.  After a mere 10 minutes I had to turn it off.  I love Star Wars....I have since the first time I saw it.   I also love my wife...also since the first time I saw her.  Together, however, they just don't work.  It began with her asking who a particular character was...I said, "that's Han Solo," to which she replied..."Is he one of those 'sky walker' guys?"  I tried to remain calm as I described Luke Skywalker...who is a Jedi, and Han Solo...a smuggler and a mercenary.  The questions continued and I kept my cool ..but then she asked, "is this the one with the baby chewbaccas...I like them."  She must have seen the tension growing on my face as I described the difference between Ewoks and Chewbacca along with who's in which movie, because she finally, after a few more questions, said...."okay, okay.....I'm done asking about Star Trek."  It was at this moment that I realized that I never saw any gray hairs prior to my wedding, six months ago.  Merely a coincidence? 

Well, before I met Heidi, never once was I almost 30, I was merely in my mid to late twenties.  I never once had a gray hair.  Certainly, I never once woke up early to watch CBS Sunday Morning.  I never went to bed by 8:30 nor did I ever eat dinner at 4:00.  At the rate she's got me going, I can only imagine when we'll be eating and sleeping at 70.  I'm sure it's not really her fault though....no....not at all.  Still, if I had to choose...there's no place and at no other time I'd rather be than right now, with Heidi, starting (and I emphasize STARTING) to grow old.  

Plus, I've heard these gray hairs make you look distinguished....though never by anyone who didn't already have them.

Boneless Wings and a Spineless Customer

Like most Americans, I enjoy going out to eat.  I love being able to sit at booth (always a booth.  For some reason I'm not a big fan of tables.  Just thought I'd throw that fact out there), sip a cold beverage, and be waited on hand and foot.  I make sure that when my waiter or waitress comes around to take my order, I am both courteous and respectful.  I've been a waitress before, so I know what it's like to have rude customers.  That's how a person can end up with weird things in their food...so I've heard.

Anyway, I had the opportunity to go to one of my favorite local restaurants, The Chicken Coop!  I went with Dylan, Mollie, and her boyfriend, Greg.  We found a corner table and ordered our drinks.  While we waited for our waitress, the subjects of baseball, Alex Rodriguez, and "The Bachelor" were discussed.  Things were going swimmingly...until our waitress came back with our drinks and seemed in a hurry to get our orders taken.  It went something like this:

Greg:  "I'll take the Buck Nasty wings".

Waitress: (stunned look) "are you sure?"

Greg: (now confused and second guessing himself) "...uh, yeah..?!"

Dylan: "I'll also take the Buck Nasty wings".  

Waitress: (rolls her eyes and walks away)

...A-W-K-W-A-R-D

I think Dylan and I once had this waitress before.  I remember being scared of her for some reason.  I think it had something to do with her one grey tooth, the fact that she was/is a bit rough around the edges, and...oh yeah, she acted like she had the hots for Dylan.  So you can imagine my comfort level when we went to go home and she stared at me and said, "ummm, what's going on?  Are you going to take your food home with you or just keep talking?"  I smiled, threw my leftovers in the take home box that was provided, and never gave her a second look.

Our waitress did a number of other things last night (mostly saying rude things and being blatantly flirtatious towards Greg and Dylan.  I'm very secure in my marriage, but I did flash my wedding ring a few times and put my arm around Dylan at least twice when our waitress was around.  ha!)

We all left a short time later after leaving a generous tip (I was afraid she was going to hunt us down and beat us up if we didn't leave at least 25%).

Dylan and I will still venture to the Chicken Coop.  We will still sit at a corner table.  And we (I) will still cower in fear when that infamous waitress brings us (me) our drinks.  

Feliz Dia de Darwin!!!

That's "Happy Darwin Day" to all of you who aren't currently in Brazil (oh...and yes, I do realize that I should have gone with Portuguese instead of Spanish , but I work with what I know).  It's the 200th anniversary of Darwin's B-day and the 150th anniversary of the publication of On The Origin of Species and I get the joy of spending it less than a couple hundred kilometers from where The Beagle first made landfall on the South American continent....not bad.  No, not bad at all.   Well...that's not to say that things haven't gone bad, or at least odd, on this trip so far though....

Well, I don't know whether to begin or end by talking about my "guide" here in Brazil.  He is a nice man, working for the company I'm meeting with here, but....to say he is helping me, guiding me, or anything else of the sort, is a bit of a stretch.  So far, he's gotten lost or severely confused while driving to the following places: the airport parking lot exit, my first hotel, dinner the first night, to work the 1st day, from work the 1st day, to work the 2nd day, from work the 2nd day, to work, from work, to work, from work....literally every day (and yes it is to and from the same place), into the hotel parking lot, out of the hotel parking lot (although in all fairness, this one he was trying to do while in reverse...for no apparent reason...which is tough...and also makes all of the buttons to raise the gait on the wrong side of the car), to dinner tonight, home from dinner tonight.  I'm not even going to begin talking about the mishaps he has while trying to WALK towards any particular entrance or exit.  

None the less though, my friend did get me a pretty good meal....well...not Monday night when, after work, he said he would call me in a little bit for dinner and then did....at 6:15 the next morning...because he fell asleep.  However, we have been to one Brazilian BBQ which was incredible.  And while they haven't yet fed me cow brains, as my mom warned and had experienced herself down here, I have had to fight off more than my fair share of chicken hearts.  On our way home from the BBQ, after running 2 red lights because "this is not an area you want to stop and wait in," my friend said, "I'm so sad, the hungry is dead" - which is either a brilliant joke or a horrible misunderstanding on my part.  I don't know which, but for the rest of the drive, all I could picture was a small orange fuzzy monster, the one representing hunger in recent diet ads, stumbling out of the restaurant, clutching his chest, and slowly expiring along the side of the road.

Prior to going to dinner, my friend (I'm going to keep calling him "friend" because if I let my actual emotions get out about him, I'm worried what I would say) and his wife were nice enough to take me shopping in case I wanted to buy anything.  Unfortunately, it was to....the mall.   America invented the mall (as far as I know) and so it was really the last place I wanted to shop.  I was already picturing arriving home and giving Heidi her present..."here you go honey, it's from Lady Foot Locker...no...the one in Brazil!"  However, Heidi can't even get that, because everything was closed except for the bookstore...essentially a Barnes and Noble.  I said, "that's okay, I'll look around here" (primarily because I had been warned that the town we were traveling to for the week was tiny and without anything to do).  So I was trying to find all my gifts and souvenirs at this store...which is all the more annoying when my friend and his wife, to be helpful no doubt, followed me step by step through the store, peering over my shoulder, repeatedly insisting that I go to the English Language section.  I wanted to shout...."Listen dammit, if I wanted to latest Dean Koontz paperback I would have bought it at the Des Moines airport!  Now let me shop and  buy something unique."  In the end, however, I did not say that, and they did force me to the English language section and made the worker there go find and bring me every English language book in the store.  After settling on a few, I looked at the journals on the way to the checkout.  I found one that looked really great, wrapped in leather, unique....as I looked through it, my friend took it from my hand, said "it is a diary...but no dates on the pages....that's not good" and put it back on the shelf.  So, not wanting to offend, I left it there...the one item I actually wanted in the store....and headed off to pay.  While in line, my friends wife, having seen the problem with the journal I wanted...brought me a suitable replacement.  A bright pink plastic diary with a little girl on it covered in sparkles, hearts and flowers....Perfect!  (Heidi...guess what present you're getting from Brazil)

So, I should really move on to more pressing matters...such as work.  On Monday morning we met up with a coworker, Ana, and headed off to our client's site...a major chemical manufacturer.  Because this is a major worldwide company, they required us all to go through safety training first.  The three of us checked in, went to the meeting room, and sat down amongst a group of about 50 people.  The trainers came out, and it began...in Portuguese....for two hours.  If you've ever had trouble staying awake during a long company meeting of your own, try doing it when you don't understand a word being said, at all, and they just keep talking, and talking, and talking.  Luckily I was able to entertain myself by watching my surroundings...such as my friend with his head between in legs sleeping, and Ana, her legs crossed into her lap, scouring up and down each with tweezers, pulling out every hair she found....right next to me....in the company meeting.  i was relieved when we finally took a break until I realized that during this break they began handing out a stack of papers and pens....a test...in Portuguese.  I have to thank my friend, however, because without missing a beat (for once) he gave me a look and leaned in towards me with his paper.  It was multiple choice...I passed the test.

So....what else could possibly have happened during my trip that would warrant a blog entry...there can't be anything else right?   Wrong!  Here they are in condensed story format:

Tuesday...while getting into the car after a long day of work I heard a horrifying "riiip."  yes...it was the seat of my pants ripping out.  Luckily we only had to make two stops on the way to the hotel....a hardware store and a restaurant for dinner and drinks....awkward!

Speaking of hardware stores...We needed to go find some electrical tape to fix my computer cord.  We went to several stores...all of which led us to other stores....until finally one pointed out a hardware store several blocks away.  We began walking until my friend, once again, decided we were lost.  Luckily for us, someone came by...actually lots of people came by...any of which looked like they'd be happy to give us directions.  However, my friend decide to only ask one.  This one was the dreadlocked, dirty, tattered man, carrying a garbage bag of cans and refuse, who was talking out loud long before we ever asked him a question.  Amazingly for us he knew where to get some electrical tape...just up the street and then a left...down the long dark unmarked alley.  He began leading us this way and I could tell even my friend was leery....however...he slowly proceeded until the man stopped to pound on a random solid door in the middle of a long metal fence.  There were no signs or windows...no ads saying Electric Tape 'R Us....nothing to indicate we would receive anything in this establishment other than our worst nightmare...so...we left, thanking the man as we darted back to the street never looking back.  

The Brazilians are a hard working people...except after lunch, when we went everyday and played foozball and for an hour.  My skills improved tremendously over the week and I even played on a team with the Sao Paulo regional foozball champion.....

I was scolded by my friend for closing his car door too hard....repeatedly

I have heard Portuguese covers of the following songs:

My Heart Will Go On

Truly Madly Deeply by Savage Garden.....maybe the most obscure song to cover ever.

In the end....I really shouldn't complain at all.  After all...I did spend the other night sitting in 90 degree weather, eating chicken pieces individually wrapped in bacon, watching Brazil defeat Italy in Soccer, listening to Samba music.  Not too bad for a week of work.

I'll see everyone soon.

Brazil is nice...but West Des Moines is better!!..?

As some of you know, Dylan  is currently working, making money, and probably seeing some cool things in Brazil.  He left yesterday morning and will return home this coming Saturday.  At first, I was slightly envious.  Who wouldn't be?  It's Summer where he is.  There are beaches where he is.  He can wear shorts, get a tan, and buy some cool new books.  However, I can honestly say that I live in a place where I can do pretty cool things too.  The place is West Des Moines.  Take a moment.  Think about what I just typed....then allow me to illustrate my point.  

1.  It's Summer in Brazil, and Dylan gets to wear shorts.

That sounds great, doesn't it?  But heck, yesterday's temperature reached 52 degrees.  Today it was near 50, and by Tuesday, it's predicted to be close to 65 degrees...in West Des Moines!  Who needs Summer with temperatures like these?!  Plus, I don't like shorts.

2.  Dylan gets to ride in airplanes and see the clouds.

FACT:  When flying in airplanes, one might experience turbulence.  Driving around this weekend on the pothole laced streets made me feel like I was experiencing turbulence.  Did I get to see clouds?  No.  But with all the rattling, banging, and bumper car-like driving I've done, I have seen my life flash before my eyes...which in my opinion, is a little more magical than clouds.  And it all happened in West Des Moines!!

3.  Dylan gets to eat exotic foods and try new things.

So do I!  Did you know that in a place like West Des Moines, there are stores that sell different flavors of syrup?  I'm not talking syrup for pancakes--I'm talking latte syrup.  I actually bought something other than caramel flavored syrup yesterday!  So, what exotic flavor did I try...and later buy?  VANILLA!!!  Look out world, Heidi Baker is breaking out of her comfort zone and is officially living dangerously...and exotically!

You see?  West Des Moines is...better.  Right?  I do know that it would be better if Dylan was home.  But I know he'll bring home lots of pictures, antique books for himself and Mike, and an interest in my week.  That's when I can tell him about the dangerous animal I saw somewhere in or around our house.  I can say that it will rival anything he's going to find in Brazil... 

(Stay tuned for a blog dealing with that monster!)

Who lost 40 pounds?!

Wow!  Two blogs in one day...from two different people!  How lucky are you, our bakery customer?!  My little rant won't be too long at all.  I just wanted to say that I got my first paying voice over job this week!  It is for a company called "Complete Nutrition", based out of Omaha or Lincoln.  I was going to try to attach the commercial to this blog, but I don't know how.  Maybe it's not even possible.  Either way, if you'd like to hear it, I can email it to you!  The funniest part of the commercial is I get to say (rather excitedly) "I used it...and lost 40 pounds!".  Nothing like lying to consumers.  

I am going to say good bye for now, and get to work on more voice work.  If you want to check out my website...here it is:  www.voices.com/people/heidiabaker

And if you get bored someday and want me to make a commercial for you, I will...at little to no charge.  Just kidding.  I'll charge a lot.  

Digital Aversion

We all have our pet peeves...for example, mine include bringing a ziploc bag of veggies to a sporting event or airport, talking during a movie, balancing one's checkbook or doing other mundane activities during a movie, asking questions during a movie...really just doing anything during a movie other staring intently, eyes wide open, at the screen in front of you....unless of course the movie is Mamma Mia...which I've recently named the worst movie I've seen this year.  

Despite all of those annoyances...for the last year, the biggest thorn in my side has been the endless parade of commercials warning about the need for a digital conversion box.  With the move to digital broadcast signals, I realize there is a need for those without cable to get such a box.  In fact, I realize it every day...multiple times a day...constantly...as rarely does an hour go by without a public service announcement warning of it.  Between the constant advertisements, scrolling warnings, and announcements, you'd think there was some sort of Digital Hurricane on its way to destroy our lands, flood our crops, steal our pets, plunder and prune the hedges of many small villages (contest: who can identify that reference first?).  Needless to say, I've been anxiously awaiting February when the conversion would finally happen and we could rid the world of these announcements...in fact...I've been counting the time down with each ad I've seen.  

So...You can imagine my dismay when I learned last week that they will be delaying the conversion until this summer to give people more time to get ready.  I think the government, as it so often does, is overlooking true human nature.  If an entire year of being barraged with reminders has not forced you to go get a converter box, then I assure you that six more months won't matter.  As a perpetual procrastinator myself....I know how this works, and the only thing that would get me to go get a converter box would be to wake up one morning and have my TV not work.  

 

So, in the end, can we please just do the conversion already and move on with our lives.  I don't know why this issue became to object of my disdain, but it did.  And, like any good pet peeve, it may be completely irrational, but it's still driving me crazy.

(Temporary) Badge of Honor

So, let me start off by saying how excited I am to have a job that...pays!  It will be nice to bring home a paycheck once again!  That means I won't be donating plasma, selling cd's, or auctioning off Noel.  

I started at Wells Fargo today as a payment processor person (I don't really know my title, I'll be honest).  I have never worked for a large corporation, and sadly, it showed today.  The following are a few mini situations that occurred today--my first day at work:

1) When I entered the side door (the same door that Dylan and I scoped out days earlier, just to make sure I knew where to go) of Wells Fargo, I noticed it was A) a revolving door, and B) it wasn't moving--even when I pushed it.  A small line was forming behind me, which made me a bit anxious.  I asked one of the men behind me what I should do.  He looked annoyed and said "you aren't allowed to enter here.  You don't have a badge.  You have to go to that door".  (That door was located on the other side of the massive building).  oops.

2) After I made it inside of Wells Fargo, I had to check in with a security guard.  He asked me who I was and what my purpose was for being at Wells Fargo.  I said my name and told him I was to meet with Melissa.  "Melissa who?" he asked.  "I don't know," I replied.  "Then you can't enter.  You need to figure out her last name", the man said, as he pointed to the exit doors.  Are you kidding me?!  I had to go outside, look through my phone records, and call Melissa to ask her last name.  I dialed the number, and I heard 'Hello, this is Lisa.'  Oops.  I went back inside to see the same security guard and told him "I am here to see Lisa Epplinger.  Not Melissa.  sorry."  I got a temporary badge and had a seat.

3) The new trainees (there were five of us) had to do the obligatory thing and have a tour of the building.  I ran into two people during the tour.  Like, literally.  I almost tripped one because I wasn't paying attention, and the other person kind of shoved me.  Great first impression.  ha!

4) There were a few points during the day when conversation was lagging.  I hate long silences, so I chimed in to the group (made up of the manager of the Apple store, a young mom, a woman who had lipstick on her teeth the whole morning, and a lady dressed in green.).  I said "geez, I've never worked in a company this big."  nobody said anything.  I learned quickly, not to talk for the rest of the day.

I go back to Wells Fargo tomorrow, same time, same place.  They do serve Starbucks there, so that 's exciting.  And I heard that I might be handling the loans taken out by famous celebrities.  As long as I enter through the correct doors, know the name of my supervisor, and keep my mouth shut, it's going to be a fun day tomorrow!

Whistle while you Work

It feels so good to be back in radio!  I feel like the world of Broadcasting and I fit together perfectly, and it makes me so happy to be back where I "belong".  

I drove to downtown Des Moines this morning to meet with my new supervisor and the volunteer coordinator.  I still have to use my GPS to get to downtown, but I have a feeling in a couple of trips, I will never have to use it again (I promise, Dylan).  The radio station studio is located on the 11th floor of the beautiful Hotel Des Moines, which boasts all original wood work and the scariest elevators ever (the one I rode on today shook so much, I started thinking of what I would do if I got stuck on it--cry, probably).  

The volunteer coordinator met me in one of the offices in the studio for a training session.  I won't reveal her name...you'll soon see why.  She was dressed professionally, had a sunny disposition, a slight bit of red lipstick on her teeth...., and she whistled when she talked.   If you've ever seen the show "Arrested Development", picture the scene where Gob loses his tooth and can't pronounce s-words without whistling.  It was hard not to laugh.  Not in a mean way, mind you.  Rather in a 'aww shucks.  You're neat" kind of way.  

Either way, the session lasted one hour and I was out of there!  But not before signing papers, getting my picture taken, and getting my hours for the week.  

If you're wondering, I'll be on 99.1FM, Tuesdays and Wednesdays from 1:00-3:00 PM, and Saturday nights!!!!  I am so excited!  And next time you're in town and want to see the studio or ride the most frightening elevators ever...let me know! :)  

oh, and for more reading enjoyment, here's the radio station website:  www.kfmg991.org.

Ah yes,...and I start at Wells Fargo on Monday.  

No good deed goes unpunished....

That old adage held true in a different way today...the good deed was Heidi's and the punishment was mine.  

I have a normal routine on cold winter mornings...I wake up, go start the car (I would park in the garage but that's where the snakes live) (Oh, and don't give me any of that 'they're hibernating' or 'migrated for the winter' bull...we both know that if I went out there now I'd be swarmed by snakes and never seen again) so as I was saying...I wake up, go start the car, come in and get dressed and ready, grab all of my things, and head to work.  This routine is important because as I pick up my keys to go start the car in the morning I see them sitting next to the pile I emptied from my pocket the night before - Driver's License, Debit Card, Prairie Meadows membership card, Home Depot gift certificate, phone number list, and insurance card.  This morning, however, since I have the greatest wife ever, Heidi started my car for me.  Which means, the very thought of my pile o' stuff didn't even enter my mind until I arrived at work, 45 minutes away, and she texted me to tell me that my ID and every form of money I have are all still there at home.   

So...what does having no ID or money mean for me today?  

First off...no lunch.  At first this didn't seem like a big deal, I've gone without lunch plenty of times when I've been busy.  However, today, when noon rolled around, it felt like I hadn't eaten in days.  I started rifling through my drawers looking for quarters to get something from the vending machine and then it happened.  I found it sitting in the back of a drawer I hadn't opened for months...behind papers and newsletters....it was amazing...the most beautiful thing ever...a can of chili, Hormel Chili flavored with Tabasco to be exact.  I examined the can for swelling and discoloration and then turned it upside down.  There it said - Mfg: 2006, expires December 2008.  The debate lasted only a fraction of a second in my head and then I knew what I would do.  Even though I refuse to drink milk on the day before it expires, if they say the chili is good for two years then certainly it is good for two years + 9 measly days.  Aged like fine wine and with the Tabasco having killed off any bacteria long ago, it was delicious, and I savored every bite.  Thank you Science for giving us Chili that'll last forever - I think I'd be willing to try it at the three year mark if it came to it.

Second...no gas money.  The needle just hit the red when I got to the parking lot this morning and the light just came on.  I believe that means a solid 30 miles worth of driving left... so that's 3/4 of the way home.  Now what about the rest?  Well...I'll only need about 1 gallon of gas to get the rest of the way.  I could siphon it from someone in the parking lot or I could see if scrounging through my desk drawers could bring another miracle.  Given all the windows in the front of our business, each with a fellow employee watching our parking lot, I thought I'd try scrounging first.  Amazingly, my desk came to the rescue again, this time in terms of my savings account.  You see, some people go with mutual funds, some with CDs, others with a simple bank account to store away the money they don't need quite yet...me...I go with another method - unclaimed lottery tickets.  Whenever I have a $1 or $2 winner I don't rush down to claim it, I tuck it away in a drawer or a coat pocket until the time comes that I need it.  Today's ticket was only a month old.  It was a Secret Snowman present and worth...wait for it...3 dollars!  Incredible!  That's enough for 1 1/2, maybe even 2, gallons of gas.  No more worries for me!  I may just spend a few minutes doing doughnuts in the parking lot or just let my car idle for the last hour of work today, either way, I'm sure everything will work out now.

In the end, all I can say is that all is right with the world.  The two greatest things, Science and Gambling, came to my rescue today.  And Heidi, know that I'm not blaming you for this, I know you were just helping.  Still, I'm gonna need you to turn on the traffic report, keep your cell phone close, and get out our AAA card cause I've got a fun ride ahead of me - cross your fingers for no traffic jams!

"Is Our First Blog Entry Really Going To Be About Our Cat?"

This is the question Dylan asked me yesterday when I told him that I was going to write about my day out with our cat, Noel.  Was I offended that he acted disgusted about our little feline friend?  Not really.  If anything, it made me want to write the blog even more.  So, to answer his question,...'YES!'

I'll admit.  When I've driven on the highways and bi ways of our grand country and have witnessed pets with their heads out car windows, I've gotten irritated.  When I see little dogs, cats, rabbits, or whatever other domesticated animal riding ''shotgun'' in their owners' vehicles, it blows my mind.  I think the following:  

A)  If your dog moves any more, you're going to crash into a ditch, lady.

B)  I bet you have no friends.

C) I can't believe I've never taken Noel out driving with me...

Well, Noel did  go with me yesterday!  I wanted to visit my grandmother and aunt in the Yale/Guthrie Center area and I thought it might be fun to take the cat with.  I put a few ratty shirts in the bottom of her pet taxi for cushioning, packed her treats in my purse (in case she started dying of hunger), and then shoved her in her little taxi.  Away we went!  

After 20 minutes of ''meow, meeeeeow, MMMMEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOWWW"...I finally let her out of her cage to roam free around my car.  At first, the experience was horrifying.  Noel would try to jump onto the dash.  She would want to hide by the brake pedal.  She would try to unlock the child safety locks and jump out of the car to her freedom (I swear, I actually thought that!).  But after a few more minutes had passed, something wonderful happened.  She climbed up on my shoulder, stopped meowing, and rested.  She slept and looked out the window the rest of the way.  'So, this is why people take their pets on the road with them!  This is what I've been missing!  Dylan and I are going to do this for the rest of our lives!'  These were all the thoughts that had crossed my mind.

...until Noel and I drove home.

Noel's constant meowing and my worrying about her health and bladder function sort of put a damper on my thoughts of feline travel.  We got home.  We ate.  Noel napped.  The End.  

...this story was a bit anti-climatic, huh?  Either way, I haven't decided if I will take our cat on another car ride again.  And I've decided not to judge people with pets in their cars....at least the people with dogs and cats.  If I see anymore people with rabbits roaming around in the back seat, I'll flip!

What we got cookin'

Hi everyone...welcome to Dylan and Heidi's new blog. I'm not sure why I started with "everyone" since I'm quite sure that there are currently no subscribers to this blog...in fact, I haven't even told Heidi about it, yet. ('Hey Heidi....we have a blog now!') However, I'm hoping that shortly all of our family and friends, not to mention droves of people we've never even met, will be checking in regualrly to see just what is up with us. Heidi and I are doing great and decided to start the new year (2009) out with the presentation of a blog so that we can 1) have a forum to discuss those awkward moments that "we" tend to wind up in all the time, 2) share some of our funny stories becasue the positive reinforcement is good for our egos, 3) have something to do other than wailing on the drums and belting out "Any way you want it" on Rock Band 2 everynight, and 4) get with the times...seriously...doesn't everyone have a blog now. Anyway, there will be lots more to come, so from Heilan, Deidi, the next Brangelina, or whatever you want to call us...thanks for reading.